Last Updated on March 11, 2024

One of the greatest things the Lord has done for us is giving us older, wiser women to model godliness for us. We see these women all around us–at church and in our communities, our moms and mothers-in-law. They are everywhere.

[verse reference=”Psalm 126:3″]The Lord has done great things for us, and we are filled with joy.[/verse]

Unfortunately for many of the younger women in need of wisdom, they are not finding godly wisdom coming from the mouths of many of the older women surrounding them.

I have had the privilege of teaching, discipling, and working with many young women and I have found that many of these young women are running away from the “wisdom” offered up by the older women in their lives. Much of this wisdom is good but too much of it is not godly wisdom.

Often our own daughters call just to talk (because they want to hear our perspectives on certain situations) and we don’t take the time to pray. We begin spouting off what we feel or believe is best for them. As older Christian women, we must return to being women of God’s word and women of prayer.

I believe it is our desire that the “words of my mouth and the meditations of my heart are acceptable in the sight of God,” but we sometimes forget to ask God to put a “guard over our tongues, and set watch over the door of our lips” (Psalms 141:3). We often talk to young women like this world is their home instead of pointing them to their Heavenly Father who has gone to prepare a place for them.

This may seem like a rant, but I recently learned of a misguided conversation that is one of many that is revealing to me that we have strayed.  A friend’s recent call to her mother-in-law to tell her she was pregnant resulted in an alarming conversation. The mother-in-law began to tell her she must have a boy because her son needs a son to do things with … they already have a daughter. I believe it is right for this mother to express her desires, but she should first be excited about God’s amazing gift of a new grandchild, no matter the sex. This would have turned the entire outcome of the conversation around and this young daughter-in-law would not be walking around wounded. We need to look at things in light of God’s gracious gifts to us and not our selfish wants or desires.

Older women, when we are called on by the younger women in our lives, we need to be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger (James 1:19). The only way to do this is to be so in tune with God that He is all that matters. We must understand that when younger women call on us, they are usually calling at a most vulnerable time with something that deeply affects them.

These are the times when we may need to say a mouthful by saying nothing at all, and take time to pray before we speak.

[verse reference=”James 5:16″]Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective. [/verse]

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  1. Such good advice, Robyn! I have learned holding my tongue is sometimes the best thing I can do and let the other person simply talk things out. I think something else us older women (and we are all older than someone!) need to be available. Sometimes it is easy to stay cloistered into small, tight knit groups and use the excuse that ‘I’m too tired to offer someone anything.’ But I think everyone misses out when this happens.
    I don’t think this post was a rant. In fact, I say, preach it, sister!
    Hugs to you!

    1. Thanks, Jennifer. And I will continue to PREACH IT because we NEED each other!

  2. Rob, so true! I remember about 20 yrs ago when I was single the “older woman” in my life was younger than me. She poured into me the importance of a “SAHM”, submission and respecting her hubby, along with raising a “godly seed” for the Lord. I am so grateful for her and her family who taught be a lot verbally and by living and watching them walk the walk! Love you, Rob!

    1. T-Nae,

      Thanks so much for your comments. “Older women” come in all shapes, sizes, and ages. I have had many a younger women be used by God in my life. I just realize how important women are in the lives of other women. May we never forget it or run from it!

  3. Renee Baldaccini says:

    Thank you Robyn for this article.. This is exactly what my heart desires to tell you this past weekend at the conference in Chicago. My need for this is immense, and you warmed my heart and brought me nearer to God when you looked at me and said we could be friends…. Christ alive in you… Renee baldaccini