Last Updated on March 23, 2025
Earthquakes, tsunamis, famine, tornados, and death — not topics of normal everyday conversations with children who wake up thinking about trucks and forts, fairy tales and parties.
But sadly this is the world into which my children and yours were born. And regrettably, suffering is the best classroom for discussing the truth about God’s character.
The summer our oldest was about nine years old, we were driving home from a week of vacation while listening to the radio; at least, Dennis and I were trying to listen.
Suddenly, the program was interrupted with the news of an airplane crash. Details of the fire, the panic of passengers, and the sirens of ambulances all caught the ears of our oldest. And she was afraid. She knew her daddy flew on airplanes a lot.
In an instant, she realized her daddy could die in a plane crash, so that day we began a conversation with her that lasted for several months as her fears resurfaced each time her daddy got on another plane.
Viewing Tragedy Through Our Faith
Oh, how we wish we could protect our children from such fears and especially from actually experiencing disasters and death. But we can’t.
What we can do is take their little hands and put them in the hands of Jesus, which is the analogy we used with our daughter, Ashley. It is Jesus who she must trust, not us. It is His character of love and grace that will guide her throughout her life, not ours.
Mothers wear so many hats, but one that most of us never consider wearing is the title of theologian, which means one who teaches about God. But more than any other responsibility, theology, the study of God, is the hat we wear that most shapes who our children become and determines how they will manage the suffering they experience in this life.
5 Truths About God to Discuss With Your Child
Here are several basic truths about God to discuss with your children. Consider it Theology 101 for kids.
1. God never intended for His children to suffer and die.
Read the story of Creation (Genesis 1–2) to your kids right out of the Bible. They need to hear every inspired word; all that God made was good, Adam and Eve were naked and not ashamed, and the concept of death was not a reality in the Garden of Eden.
(If your children are preschoolers, you might want to read from an abbreviated children’s version of the Bible. But don’t ignore the actual words of God for too long.) Ask them the question, “What kind of food did Adam and Eve eat, and what did the animals eat?”
The answer is in Genesis 2:29 and 30. This shows us that no one originally ate meat, which means there was no killing of animals. Even lions, tigers, and bears ate plants. Death, including the death of animals, was not a part of the garden.
Then read Genesis 3 and discuss how and why everything changed forever. Specifically read the verse (Genesis 3:22) that says the fruit of the tree of life was present for Adam and Eve to eat and live forever. That was God’s original intention, but after Adam and Eve disobeyed, God moved them out of the garden so they would not eat from that tree and live forever, unable to ever be rescued.
This first concept is a big one.
Explaining sin and death is complicated, but it is the first step to helping children understand where pain all began and why.
It’s a great comfort for our children to understand God’s heart of love never intended for us to die. We were the ones who messed up His perfect plan. As your children begin to hear about the tragedies of life, give them this knowledge about God and then continue the discussion over the years to come.
We cannot isolate our children from difficulty. To do so would be to create an invalid. Yes, you must monitor how much they hear. God will give you wisdom if you ask Him to guide you.
As moms, it is our job, as we teach this theology of truth about God, to trust Him to take the seeds we are planting in our children’s hearts and grow those little people into strong men and women of character.
2. Storms will come.
The temptation as moms is to teach our children feel-good verses like this one: “Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you,” (Matthew 7:7), or this verse: “Do all things without grumbling or questioning,” (Philippians 2:14).
I liked that one best as a mom. I was hoping it would work like a magic wand. Sadly, it did not.
The point is that we must teach our children all of the truth about God, even the parts that are hard.
Jesus said, “… In the world you will have tribulation, …” (John 16:33). He does not lie, so He tells us honestly that life will be hard.
In Isaiah 45:7, God speaks these words about Himself that are truly shocking to our human thinking. “I form light and create darkness, I make well-being and create calamity, I am the LORD, who does all these things.”
Did you feel the clash in your soul as you read “well-being” and “calamity” in one sentence? There is no understanding available for this truth. We cannot grasp this one with our finite minds, but we dare not ignore it.
While safety and peace are to be pursued in this life at home and in our communities, our children need to understand that permanent safety and peace will only happen one day in heaven.
Moms and dads need to work hard to create a healthy home environment, but also teach that there will be storms that disrupt life. We cannot stop them any more than we can stop the wind of a tornado.
Perhaps your children know the song about the wise man and the foolish man Jesus talked about. The wise man built on the rock and the foolish man built on the sand. The song is memorable, but your job as a parent is to teach your children about the Rock. The song won’t be of much use when the storms come in their little lives, but the Rock of Christ will.
READ THIS NEXT: 15 Powerful Promises of God for Kids
3. God can be trusted when disasters come.
How can we trust a God who tells us He creates calamity? And why should we? Because His character is good and pure.
Though He brings disaster, He never has evil motives. He acts out of justice and love toward His creatures. How do you explain this to a child? Take them to the Bible again.
Show them Romans 8:28, “And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.”
Talk about this promise and what it means to love God and to be called to His purpose.
Another verse of great hope and comfort is Hebrews 13:8, “Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.”
He never changes, which is wonderful news to you, me, and our children.
A God who changes can’t be trusted, but a God who never changes can be trusted implicitly, even if we don’t understand why He does what He does.
Consider this question from Job, “… Shall we receive good from God, and shall we not receive evil? …” (2:10). We all want the good, but we never want the adversity.
It begins with us moms and dads. Do we trust God with adversity? Do we complain when disaster strikes, or are we modeling for our children hearts that trust God’s character in all things?
We need these talking points to direct our children to God’s Word — the Rock upon which we must each build. But if we don’t show them by our attitudes and actions that we believe these truths, they won’t believe them either.
4. God did not promise an easy life.
This may be a topic for older children and teens because Jesus teaches clearly that, “If the world hates you, know that it has hated me before it hated you” (John 15:18).
There are many Christians around the world who have suffered disaster in their lives because of the hatred of men. Though in America today this is thankfully not a reality, our children will experience ridicule or rejection in many situations when they stand up for Jesus.
Being identified with Christ is not a road to a blissful life, but rather it’s a choice to identify with a Savior who suffered and tells us we, too, will suffer for following Him.
5. God will make all things right.
The great hope for all of us who have chosen to follow Christ with our lives is the promise of eventual justice. God said, “’Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord,’” (Romans 12:19).
We can know that God will repay the evil suffered in this life because of our loyalty as Christians.
Another promise our children need to know is found in Revelation 21:4–5.
“He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away. And he who was seated on the throne said, “Behold, I am making all things new. …”
In the end, we as moms need to remember that it is good for our children to see and experience suffering as God brings it. God will not give them too much, nor will He abandon them.
In these difficult situations, our children have the opportunity to develop compassion and empathy for others. When we and our children suffer loss we understand more fully when others experience loss. And growing empathy is the antidote to selfishness, which is what God desires to diminish in our lives and our children.
Conclusion
This world can be a scary place, especially when you’re growing up and learning about it all. Our tendency can be to shrink away—to run and hide. But God would have us live with courage and confidence—things we can experience only when we understand that God is on our side. By pointing our kids to Scripture, we can offer our family hope, confidence, and security that allows them to be strong, bold, and courageous.
The following two resources would also be helpful as you have discussions with your children about disasters.
With captivating true stories to read as a family, this seven-day interactive devotional saturates minds and hearts with memorable accounts and vivid illustrations of true heroes who made noble choices. Encounter real-life heroes right in your living room—and begin to grow together in character as a family.
Seeds of Courage is a scripture-memory tool that’s also full of fabulous music. The Scripture-based songs have memorable lyrics that the whole family will love. Each song helps a child (and any adults in the vicinity) memorize one or more Bible verses specifically focused on anxiety and fear.
What other tips would you add in talking with your children about disasters?
*This post was originally published as a 3-part series in June 2011*
Thanks for the reminder today! My cousin was killed in the Joplin tornado and my 5 yr old sees me fall into tears now and then. I talked a lot with my teenagers when they were little and I still do, but I seem to have forgotten how to talk with a little one. Not forgot, but definitely rusty. Thanks!
i'm sorry about your cousin Linnette. the tornados this spring have been tragic. Even one death is too many. It's good for your children to see you mourn. You are teaching them even in that processing.
Bless you.
Thanks for the reminder that when our little ones have questions we should answer them using scripture as the basis and to help them understand.