Last Updated on March 21, 2018

Or are you sick of sex?

I am sick of the enemy deceiving those I love.  I take it personally and frankly am not going to take it anymore.

At church, marriage conferences and even with my relatives I am seeing that women are bored, tired, and unconcerned with continuing to pursue growth in sexual intimacy with their husbands.

I think Christian couples should have the best sex on earth!  We have a personal relationship with the very creator of sex.  Yet, I believe, it is the most misunderstood bonus of marriage.

This misunderstanding of intimacy comes because we just let sex happen and do not become students willing to learn what we need to enhance and grow in intimacy with our spouses.

Sexual intimacy is a gift from God to every married couple for our enjoyment.  There are many areas that keep us from experiencing great sex.  We are often distracted by our body image; we are ashamed of our shapes.  As moms , there is more in our bedrooms that belongs to others in our home and we are too busy to set our stage for this main event. When abuse, dysfunction, or misinformation plagues us, we must learn to shatter old systems and see the truth of sexual intimacy.  These areas and so many more hinder us from a fulfilling sex life with our husbands.

I would love to be able to ask every married reader of this blog if they have a satisfying sex life.  Then pose the same question to each husband.  For the majority, based on the response I have received from the women in my life, sex is alright but not many of us are saying it is great.  What’s up with that ?!  Our God, who is above all and knows all created everything, including sexual intimacy and it should be ‘mm, mm, good.’

It is time for Christians to once again take ownership over sexual intimacy and allow the world to see authenticity even in our view of sexual intimacy.  It’s time for us to take back what the enemy has tried to steal from us… a super sex life.

I wrote SOS: Sick of Sex with every woman I love in mind.  I wrote it for women I may not personally know but are in relationships where sexual mediocrity reigns. I wrote it because I believe it is time for Christian women (and  men) who enjoy sex to proclaim this with no fear or shame.  I wrote it because I believe God did come to give us abundant life in every area.

It is time for Christians to fight against all that the enemy has tried to wrong with sex and bring glory and honor to God every time we are sexually intimate.

Who’s with me?


Editor’s Note:  This post and all of our posts regarding intimacy in marriage are not directed to women in abusive relationships.  Any woman in an abusive situation should seek pastoral and/or professional help.  No one should ever engage in sexual activities that are uncomfortable, painful or demeaning to them. 

We are not here to minimalize your situation or make you feel worse about where you are. There is an “Ask for Help” button in the sidebar that will connect you to someone who is waiting to correspond with you and pray for you. 

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  1. Robyn,
    Thanks for speaking about such a sensitive subject, and you hit one of my issues right on. I am sensitive about my shape. I feel a bit saggy and baggy and that affects the way I think my husband sees me. The truth is, that stuff doesn’t bother him anyway.

    1. Great post! And, girls, bad body image is so toxic to your heart. And, Jennifer! You’re a beautiful person inside and out! Stop bad-talking to yourself in front of the mirror!!

  2. Girl, you are still something else. We all got a long way to go, but at least I have started the journey.

  3. Evans McBride says:

    Well written blog. You are helping a lot of men with this infomation. Keep up the outstanding work and we will pray that God continue to bless your family so you can bless ours. Thanks. Evans McBride.

  4. Chantele Ferguson says:

    Robbie, I love the passion and fervor with which you speak the truth! “For freedom Christ has set us free; stand firm therefore, and do not submit again to a yoke of slavery.” (Galatioans 5:1) You remind us that we are free to enjoy great sex with our husbands. This is true, not just a notion. Thank you oodles!

  5. This subject is such a big passion of mine, growing up in church we were taught sex before marriage was a sin… which I took to mean sex in general was bad. When I finally gave myself away to my HUSBAND, I felt shame as if I was sinning. Praise God, he blessed me with a very caring and patient husband and we were able to work through my emotions together. Now I want to shout from the roof tops that sex is AMAZING when you do it God’s way. My husband and I actually pray and thank God for the gift of sex and intimacy that he has given us.

  6. This was so awesome, Robyn! After suffering through a few traumatic things in my life, I had some challenges with intimacy after marriage. But I’m so thankful for a patient husband who prays with me and embraces our sexual intimacy. We definitely enjoy having lots of fun in the bedroom! I love it and am grateful for a true man of God.

    Marriage Rocks!!!!! 😉

    P.S., I’m so looking forward to reading your book!!! Thanks for bringing up a real subject like that!


  7. Wowzers do I need this!! I have been married almost 2 years now – and this is an on going struggle 🙁 I have always felt like sex is bad and a sin… and I am still struggling to break that mentality. But taking one step at a time…

  8. My husband and I have been married for almost 11 years and have been blessed with 4 children aged 2, 6,8,10. I am blessed to have such a wonderful husband who works hard for us and loves me unconditionally. Even though we have had ups and downs and the stresses of 4 children we have always maintained our sex life and made it a priority along with regular date nights, (even if that means we put kids to bed and have popcorn and movie at home) our sex life is still as mind blowing today as it was when we got married. As a wife I know alot of the time there is a stigma that women try and get out of sex or do it just to keep their husbands happy but I for one am not that wife. God gave us marriage where 2 become 1 . My husband and I never feel closer or more in love than when we are intimate. I love to share my body with my husband and please him . Sorry for the details but at the end of the day god created woman for man. What I can say is respecting my husband in all aspects of our marriage makes for a perfect one – but luckily he loves and respects me right back 🙂

    1. Kara,

      Thanks for posting this much needed comment. Sexual intimacy between husband and wife should be prioritized and fought for. I hope many will read your comment and fight for intimacy also.