Last Updated on March 20, 2018
I’ve had a rough couple of days. A girlfriend of many years said some really hurtful things to me which totally took me by surprise. I was so caught off guard that I haven’t known how to respond and I’ve replayed our relationship over and over in my mind wondering what I’ve done wrong. It hasn’t been fun. It’s kept me up at night. And it’s clouded my days.
This morning I’d promised to meet a gal for coffee. Although she goes to our church I did not really know her. She is a gorgeous, 48-year-old woman who has had a very successful career at top levels here in Washington, D.C. To her disappointment she’s never married, and she recently lost her job.
When I asked her about her life, she shared her disappointments honestly, yet she focused on the specific ways she is experiencing God at work in her life. Woven into her story were recent examples of little ways she’s observed God’s hand each day—from an unexpected credit on a bill to an encouraging conference she’d attended. When I asked her what had given her the peace I noticed she replied, “I’ve discovered that when I awake in the morning I have a choice. I can choose to live for God today or I can choose to focus on my circumstances and my pain. So each day I am attempting to choose God.”
What was evident to me was that her simple choice was bringing her peace and joy.
My new friend encouraged me. Her life is totally unlike mine. Yet we, as women, struggle with many of the same issues. Because her world is so different, listening to her gave me a fresh perspective. Hearing how God was speaking to her in her disappointments encouraged me and restored my own perspective. Not only was I reminded that daily I must choose to focus on God but I also experienced the joy of hearing how he was at work in someone else’s life.
Susan Yates has written thirteen books and has spoken nationally and internationally on the subject of marriage, parenting and women’s issues for many years. For 11 years she was a regular columnist on parenting for Today’s Christian Woman magazine. Susan is the mother of five and has 21 grandchildren, including a set of quads. She is devoted to sharing her wisdom and experience with moms and wives and is selflessly available to those in need. Susan has been a mom for 40 years, she and John have been married for 43 years.
Thanks, Susan. At a time when life hurts, God has been reminding me over and over in His Word, and most recently in your post, that I should give thanks in everything. It helps keep my eyes on Him. And the pain carries less weight when I compare it to eternity.
Dear Susan,your books have been a huge source of encouragement and teaching to me over the years. As a Mom to 5( 4 boys and 1 girl) I have struggled to keep all the plates spinning and still have somewhat of a peaceful household. Your funny stories (the baby ointment) and all helped me laugh a little more and relax with mine. Thank you!
Love and Hugs,
Rebecca W.
South Carolina
Rebecca,
Thanks so much for your comment! It's really encouraging to hear from you! Bless you with your 5! Have a great summer.
Hugs, Susan
Ellie,
Thanks for reminding all of us to give thanks! It's a daily lesson I keep having to practice.
Bless you!
Susan
Hi Susan, I was in a dorm Bible study that you lead at UGA my freshman year. Gosh, that was 1968! Anyway, I have loved seeing your face on books, listening to you on the radio, and now giving away to friends your latest book collaboration with Barbara on the empty nest. The book has really ministered to me. I love giving it to my friends (boasting that I know one of the authors!) I am about to take it over to my friend Shari and so I looked through it again through her eyes. I know it will encourage her like it has me. You and Barbara did a great job on this. Do you ever do any speaking in Texas?
Sometime, I'd love for you or Barbara to address your perspectives on loaning money to adult children.