Last Updated on March 20, 2018
I stood slicing cucumbers in the kitchen when my 10-year-old son, Nathan, entered, eyes bright.
“Mom, guess what. Colter got four rabbits, and he’s part of a rabbit club. He said I could join and that rabbits don’t cost much money.”
“A rabbit club, huh?”
Rabbits are cute … and caring for one would teach responsibility, I told myself.
But the other part of me — the realistic part — quickly interrupted. What are you going to cut out in order to add that club to your schedule?
My husband and I have discussed our family’s activities many times, and we’ve agreed on where to place our focus: home-schooling, one extracurricular activity per child each year, family meals, church service, and bedtime devotions.
I took a deep breath. “I’m afraid that won’t work, Nathan. You already chose to play soccer this year.”
My heart ached when Nathan slumped away, disappointed. Logically, my decision made sense, but I couldn’t get over the feeling that I was a bad mom. Other guilty thoughts joined in the party. Colter’s mom has a garden. Caleb’s mom plays video games with him. Dakota’s mom cooks amazing meals every night. …
Guilt is a common emotion among mothers — whether our kids are 17 days or 17 years old. Sometimes guilt comes when we compare ourselves to other mothers. Other times it comes from an ideal we’ve dreamed up.
One of the best ways to slam the door on guilt is to realize we compare our weaknesses with someone else’s strengths. The best guilt buster is to focus on what we do best and humbly build on that.
I love Ephesians 2:10: “For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.”
This verse reminds me that God made me with specific talents. By inviting Jesus to work through me in my parenting role, I will do good works — not identical to other moms, but good works all the same.
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Tricia Goyer has made a career out of writing and using that gift to uplift others. With over 35 books published she enjoys using real life stories to inspire through fiction and non-fiction. Tricia is the mom of six, three grown children and three adopted little ones – that’ll end up being forty years of parenting know how! As a former teen mom she is now dedicated to reaching out to other teen moms. She is a favored speaker at writing events around the country and hosts her own Living Inspired radio program where she shares the inspiration behind great books and ministries. Tricia has been a mom for 24 years, she and John have been married for 23 years.
Love! I feel this way a lot. I am also encouraged about with you and your husband discussing and deciding on priorities. This is what we need to work on! Thanks!