Back in college, an acquaintance asked me why I would take my husband’s name when I got married. I explained that it was like declaring to be on the same team. Just as members of a sports team identify themselves by the team’s name, married couples should do the same.

Now that I am married with children, I must live those words, especially when it comes to disciplining the children. As much as we agree, my husband and I don’t always see things from the same perspective. A recent disastrous dinner comes to mind. He chose a battle with one of the children I did not think was necessary. In fact, it irritated me. What to do?

I bowed my head and prayed. I was reminded of my words and more. We are a team, and my husband is the head coach. If I choose to belittle his parenting, especially in front of the children, I wound my greatest ally. A team should take up their differences in the locker room, away from any watching eyes. They must present a unified front to their opponents. And disrespecting the head coach is a bad idea.

So, what did I do? I kept my mouth shut. And you know what? It turned out my husband was right to chose the battle, I was just too emotional to see it at the time.