Homeschooling Fears

When I first started homeschooling I was afraid of a few things.

1. My kids would get on my nerves.

2. My kids wouldn’t get enough socialization.

3. My educational weaknesses would be my kids’ educational weaknesses.

Now in my 17th year of homeschooling, I can say that all of those have come TRUE.

1. My kids did get on my nerves. There were times I’d escape into my bedroom for three minutes of peace and quiet … only to have them follow me, pounding on the door. Our school days weren’t perfect. They sometimes fought with each other. There were concepts they couldn’t get even though I tried and tried to explain. There were times I woke up on the wrong side of the bed and just had a bad attitude. (Or they did.)

Yet looking back now those memories pale to the ones where we had fun and enjoyed learning together. Now that three of my kids are older we talk about our field trips, the books we read, and the projects we worked on. We have months and years of material to draw from. We are close because of the time we spent together–good times, bad times, fun times.

2. My kids didn’t get enough socialization with kids their own age during some seasons of their lives. For a few years when, we only had one car, they only had the chance to play with neighborhood kids or kids at church. There were times when my preteen daughter sat alone at middle school youth group because she didn’t feel included. There were days my sons begged me not to make them play community sports because they didn’t know any of the other kids.

Yet things didn’t stay that way. We got involved in homeschool co-ops. They played sports for years (and liked it!). In high school our home became “the place” where the homeschool basketball teams hung out and youth group parties were held. My kids have developed deep friendships with others from homeschool sports and church that they can count on. My daughter, who is in college, helped to start not one but two on-campus Bible Studies. They did have awkward moments growing up, but don’t most kids? Another thing I didn’t expect is how much they’d grow in their friendships with each other.

3. I admit it, I’m the worst math and science teacher on the planet. When my kids did standardized testing they were far above grade average in everything… except those two subjects. My kids are not math wizards. They have done “just enough” math in college to get by. Just yesterday I talked to someone about tutoring my High School Senior in math. This mom would rather study ancient history or discuss the themes of great novels. I’d rather take a trip to explore historical sites than work on geometry problems.

The good news is my strengths have become their strengths–to the extreme. My kids have excelled in college. My daughter was called out by the dean of her college for her writing skills. My sons are working on novels. They’ve traveled all around the US and we’ve explored Europe as a family. God has multiplied my strengths within them, and He’s using that for His glory. Yes, we might need to pull out a calculator in the grocery store, but we’ll weave a great story telling about it!

Maybe you have fears as a homeschooling mom, all of us do. The great news is that you can turn to God to ease your worries. You can also turn to Him to turn your weaknesses into strengths. It’s helped me to realize that no child’s education will be perfect. The best part of homeschooling is that we did it together and we’ve had a tailor-made experience that we’ll always look back on with joy.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

*

32 thoughts on “Homeschooling Fears

  1. I appreciate this, Tricia. It's so true that there really are bad days in homeschooling! But the benefits so outweigh the negatives. Way to go! It's a reminder to me to build memories in all of the day… not just focusing on the one area that I'm weak in.

    VA:F [1.9.22_1171]
    Rating: +1 (from 1 vote)
  2. Thanks for sharing this, Tricia. I've thought about homeschooling so many times. I admit, my concern is all of what you mentioned. I'm going to keep praying about it.

    Great article!

    VA:F [1.9.22_1171]
    Rating: 0 (from 0 votes)
  3. Thank you for the encouragement. I’ve been praying for wisdom as my son starts school next year. I have a lot of fears about homeschool, so thank you for keeping it real and encouraging me!

    VA:F [1.9.22_1171]
    Rating: 0 (from 0 votes)
  4. Thanks for the look ahead as I am only beginning with a pre schooler. I am the worst at grammar and spelling. My spell checker is telling me schooler is wrong and I don't know why! I was also worried, after talking to a neighbor yesterday about her brothers homeschooled kids, that they would end up only knowing each other and not friends with anyone else and be immature cause at 13 they follow their ten year old sister. Nice to know I am not alone!

    VA:F [1.9.22_1171]
    Rating: +1 (from 1 vote)
  5. I don't think #2 is a homeschooling socialization issue at all. I had the same problems and I went to public and Christian school. Just wanted to let that be known because I think the whole socialization thing about homeschoolers is a really sad excuse or fear.

    VA:F [1.9.22_1171]
    Rating: 0 (from 0 votes)
    • I wanted to clarify….i don't think #2 is a "homeschooling" issue alone. It's a kid issue, a human issue really.

      Amy- if you want your kids to know other kids, be intentional about getting them around other kids. Its the parents responsibility to make things happen in public school or homeschool. I went to public school and was the most lonely little girl. Public school does not make you social.

      VA:F [1.9.22_1171]
      Rating: +1 (from 1 vote)
  6. Thanks for this post. I've been homeschooling for 5 years this year, and I have a love/hate relationship with it. I've really been struggling with wanting to send them to a private school, but not quite sure I want to do that either. I was homeschooled all the way through school and always wished growing up that I could attend a christian school. It is good to hear people who encourage us on!

    VA:F [1.9.22_1171]
    Rating: 0 (from 0 votes)
  7. Those were also my fears during my first two years of homeschooling. I worried that I couldn't teach as well as their former public school teachers. I was afraid that I would miss teaching them crucial pieces of information that would cause them to test poorly and, therefore, ruin their chances of getting into college. Ridiculous, right?

    My oldest daughter graduates in May. She has a 4.0 GPA and scored a 28 on her ACT! She hasn't decided on a college yet – we're visiting her top three choices in the next few weeks. She would like to pursue a degree in music or equine science, two things she's most passionate about.

    Here's the thing. She wouldn't have discovered her love of guitar and horses without my decision to homeschool her. Because I wanted her to have a well-rounded education, I encouraged her to explore her interests. Homeschooling gave us the flexible schedule to do just that. In public or private school, she would have spent all day at school and most of the night doing homework, leaving little time for extracurricular classes. Homeschooling rocks!

    VA:F [1.9.22_1171]
    Rating: 0 (from 0 votes)
  8. The "no friends" is what wakes me up at night. We started homeschooling 2 years ago and I worry a lot about causing my kids to have no friends. I guess "quantity" doesn't mean "quality" just because they were around lots of kids while in public school doesn't mean they had lots of friends. It is definitely more difficult to get them together with other kids when you have them at home. I am making an effort to get them involved in different activities and pray daily that I am doing the right thing for them. Thanks for the information from someone who has been there and done it.

    VA:F [1.9.22_1171]
    Rating: 0 (from 0 votes)
      • My kids have wonderful friends now. My daughter has a TON of friends–that’s her personality. My sons have a few, good friends, and that’s great, too!

        VA:F [1.9.22_1171]
        Rating: 0 (from 0 votes)
  9. We are due for our first baby in Sept and my husband and I are already thinking waaayyy ahead about schooling. He is super encouraging in wanting me to stay at home and eventually homeschool our child (or children if we have more). However, I’m a bit concerned about our financial situation. We’re definitely okay with 2 incomes. I’m already preparing for some changes once I stop working and we only have 1 income with extra baby expenses. And my question for Tricia and any moms who have been through the homeschooling experience is ~ how do we prepare financially for homeschooling our children? Are there any good solid resources out there that will help to calculate the costs involved?

    VA:F [1.9.22_1171]
    Rating: 0 (from 0 votes)
  10. Thank you for posting this. I am in my first year of homeschooling and feel like I should have it all together already!!

    VA:F [1.9.22_1171]
    Rating: 0 (from 0 votes)
  11. Thanks for sharing this post. I’m really afraid about homeschooling, yet we decided to start this august. I will have a 2nd and 1st graders, a kinder, a pk and a new born. It will be a big challenge, but God have already let us know that this is the path to follow. Just dont know how to start or what to teach…. Anyway is good to know that myf ears are normal!

    VA:F [1.9.22_1171]
    Rating: 0 (from 0 votes)
  12. Thanks for this article. All of the above are my fears. If I had 100% certainty that all would go well, I’d do it in a heartbeat. It’s just so hard to go against the unknown. Also, I only have one child (6yrs old), so I worry more about having enough interaction since he has no siblings. Please be in prayer for me. I want whatever God’s will is for our family and our son.

    VA:F [1.9.22_1171]
    Rating: 0 (from 0 votes)
  13. Its like you took these fears right out of my brain! My little one is due in November. I’ve been going back and forth: so I or shouldn’t I? Thank you for this! Now I’m leaning more towards homeschooling than ever. Even if its just for a little while.

    -Lara

    VA:F [1.9.22_1171]
    Rating: 0 (from 0 votes)
  14. Thank you for this great look back into your homeschool life. I am still in the process of pulling my kids one by one and deschooling before the great stuff comes. I have many moments just as you described, however, we have had some wonderful triumphs as well. It’s helpful to know others have similar worries, fears, experiences, and triumphs in their lives. We’Re looking forward to a bright future with happy, well rounded, well educated, and we’ll adjusted children. Thanks again.

    VA:F [1.9.22_1171]
    Rating: 0 (from 0 votes)

Motherhood vs. My Personal Goals

Earlier this year, there were a few weeks that presented many schedule challenges. Inclement weather caused cancelled school and activities. The kids were home. The kids were bored. The kids were needy. That meant the mom’s schedule changed, too. Worse, my daughter with autism didn’t understand that icy roads meant we couldn’t go for a Continue »

31 Really-Think-About-It Questions to Boost Your Parenting

Feeling passionate about parenting? If you’d genuinely like a shot in the arm for your parenting, perhaps these questions can get you started. But remember (overachievers beware!): Their effectiveness is proportional to your level of honesty, humility—and most of all, dependence on God’s power to make His presence a reality in your children’s lives. It Continue »