Why Marriage Is Your First Ministry

Last Updated on April 8, 2024

Before getting married, Benjamin and I always said we wanted our marriage to be our ministry. But we honestly had no idea if we could do that and what exactly that would look like.

Well, 16 years and seven kids later, God has taken us places and given us opportunities beyond our wildest dreams. He has also taught us so much about each other and about Himself.

In the early days of dating, relationships, and marriage, there are usually a lot of warm, fuzzy feelings. You haven’t been through a lot yet together or been stretched and challenged. But as the years go by, you realize more and more what it means to truly walk together in sickness, health, valleys, peaks, and so much more. 

Now more than ever, we know that marriage is about so much more than just, “I like you and you like me.” It’s about growing spiritually and serving God and others together.

So what does it actually mean for your marriage to be a ministry? To understand that, we have to go back to the heart of what the Bible says marriage is.

In Genesis 2 God talks about man and woman entering a covenant and becoming one flesh.

In Matthew 19, Jesus talks about a man and woman leaving their parents to become one in everything they do.

“Haven’t you read,” he replied, “that at the beginning the Creator made them male and female, and said, ‘For this reason, a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’?  So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.” – Matthew 19:4-6

So when we go out into the world to reflect Jesus, as a married couple we do that together.

That doesn’t mean it’s always easy, but there is so much good when we model our marriage after God’s Word.

As believers, we’re united with Christ in the same way that a man is united with a woman. Marriage is a representation of Christ and His church. When you choose your spouse as a believer, you really have to think ‘This is the person that I’m going into ministry with.'”

The simple fact of people seeing you love your spouse as you love yourself – that’s ministry.

How you raise your children together and the values that uphold in your home – that’s ministry.

How you interact with and treat your neighbors, and what you choose to invest your time and money into together – that’s ministry.

How we care spiritually and emotionally for our spouse is part of our ministry as well.

If we forget to draw close to Christ and seek His will in our relationships, we make ourselves more susceptible to attacks from the enemy.

When marriage is done God’s way, it can be really, really good. But you have to welcome God into it.

The richest most fulfilling marriages come when we recommit ourselves and our marriage to Him, each and every day. Outside of everything else that you will do, as a wife, marriage is your first ministry.

So what do others see when they look at your marriage?

This article is adapted from our podcast episode “How To Never Give Up As A Parent” on 𝐖𝐡𝐲 𝐨𝐫 𝐖𝐡𝐲 𝐍𝐨𝐭 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐖𝐚𝐭𝐬𝐨𝐧𝐬. You can listen to the full episode right here.