I unloaded the dishwasher and listened as my girls giggled and chattered in the other room. They had dumped out the pieces of a board game, much too old for them, and were making up their own rules and procedures. I smiled to myself, happy they had found something (other than a screen) to occupy a few minutes of another long summer day. I thought about their brain development and how the creative process and using their imaginations was good for it. And then my mama brain wandered off, thinking about their futures and the people they would become.
This is something I think about quite often, and I’ll be honest: I have a pretty clear vision of who I hope they will be. I believe this is important because as their mama, I am their guide, their shelter, and their steering wheel. Essentially, I help put together the pieces of their life puzzles. Without a vision (the picture on the puzzle box), there’s no way to know where the pieces go.
I am not God, of course, and I don’t hold their futures in my hands. But with a clear vision, much intentionality, and prayer, I believe I can help guide and craft them into the people He wants them to be.
I have a few families that come to mind when I envision how I want ours to turn out—people who have fought the good fight, lived intentionally, and raised children who passionately love the Lord. I think it’s important that we all contemplate those we know and ask ourselves what our goals are. Who do we want our children to be like? And most importantly, what did those families DO to get to where they ARE?
We cannot be lazy and passive in our parenting now and expect our children to somehow turn out great. It takes effort, sacrifices, and many times, hard choices.
Of course, sometimes God intervenes and transforms a child in spite of his parenting, but typically, children are the product of their raising.
My children are only 3 and 5, and I’m sure my vision for them will expand and evolve over the years. But right now, I’m praying they become people who are rooted in family—that they have a security at home, anchored in shared experiences and inside jokes, that they know cannot be shaken.
I’m praying that throughout high school, they have a deep, genuine relationship with their Father God so I don’t have to constantly preach that their worth is not in boys or Instagram likes. I’m praying sexual purity starts in their hearts—that they see it not as a rule to keep or be broken but as a gift from God that will give them the most fulfilling futures.
And I’m praying they have a sense of independence, bravery, and the ability to trust God and take risks.
The thought of them leaving my nest one day doesn’t sadden me as much as it excites me when I think about what they might accomplish for God’s kingdom. I’m praying they are well prepared, well equipped, and well rounded, ready to take on the world (or maybe just college at first). I’m praying they understand the part they play in God’s story and that they see their lives as eternally significant, living every day with the end in mind.
Yes, the vision is big. But with God all things are possible. I encourage you to visualize your children all grown up, too. Who will be the people coming home to your Thanksgiving table? One day as you all hold hands and gather around, may you look at the faces in your circle and thank the Lord for His faithfulness in letting you help piece together the people they are.
Kelcie Huffstickler has a B.S. in Journalism from Arkansas State University and has written for a number of family publications and websites. She and her high-school-sweetheart hubby have been married for seven years and parents for four. They have two daughters, Eden and Selah, and sometimes feel like they’re swimming upstream in the toddler years. Kelcie’s husband is a firefighter, and she works part-time as a high school abstinence education instructor. Despite feeling overwhelmed by this stage of life, Kelcie is committed to intentional parenting and passing a heritage of faith to her children. She enjoys living among family in the safety of a small town and writes about it on her blog This Beautiful Inheritance.
Kelcie Says: “Hi y’all, I’m Kelcie. I’m a small town, southern girl through and through! My hubby, two girls, and I live a simple life with more family in a two mile radius than you thought possible! On most days, you can find me playing Cinderella, making “cheese sandwiches,” and pretending not to see the worst hiders ever in a game of hide-and-seek. We also enjoy popping in on my parents who live three blocks away and rounding up cousins for a play-date. During those rare moments of Mommy Time, I enjoy cups of coffee, writing, and a little Dr. Phil. I’m a far-from-perfect Mama but thankful for God’s Grace that covers me anyway.”