Am I Missing Something?
I’m in a rather funky place … and when I say funky I don’t mean some fun and crazy place where people dress with flair and the music is cranking. My funky place should probably be described as a fussy place.
Single motherhood has made me tired–emotionally, physically, spiritually, and mentally. When things get funky and fussy, I tend to focus on them instead of my Savior.
A few months back the kids and I were watching the film, The Voyage of the Dawn Treader. There was one particular line that struck me as profound. Please forgive me, I cannot remember the exact quote, but Prince Caspian said something to the effect that he’d spent too much time focusing on what was taken from him rather than what was given to him. Isn’t that often the case? I often lament what I don’t have rather than rejoice in what I do have.
It’s easy to focus on what’s missing in our family … it’s blaringly obvious. And at times it can seem overwhelmingly huge. But when I choose to focus less on the lack, and more on my blessings, the blessings become quite large in their own right!
I have a little black notebook and although it doesn’t contain a list of possible suitors, it does have a list of little and big things for which I’m thankful. I’ve been amazed at how easy it is to add to my list. There are so many little blessings each day. The sound of driving on gravel … candles lit early in the morning … a dish-free sink … the delight of watching happy children … a soft breeze … making it to the auto shop with a dead battery (no kidding!) … swirling steam off a cup of hot tea … a fat robin on the first day of spring … a bouquet of flowers … and a million more.
The biggest blessings are my children, truly. I wouldn’t laugh or cry so hard if it weren’t for those five dear people. God was so good to give me each one of them. My life is richer, more challenging, happier, full of more love and grace than I could imagine because of those sweet children. Hearing my college-age son say, “I love you Mama,” the joy of knowing my teenage daughter still values my opinion (at least most of the time), enjoying the stories excitedly shared by my 12-year-old son, relishing my cuddly 6-year-old daughter’s hug, and smiling to my core at the antics of my sweet and spicy 5-year-old daughter … truly I’m blessed.
Those five people make me who I am … Momma. The loss of my marriage makes me a single mom, but really that’s just the number of parents in our home, not my defining feature. I might be missing my partner in life, but I’m determined to not miss any more blessings. I might be missing sleep, but I’m not missing life.
Life is good! My children are a joy! My focus will no longer be what I’m missing, but what I have … and what I have is very, very good.
What are you thankful for today?