Last Updated on March 20, 2018
How do you define a home? What images come to your mind? Hot meals on a table? Decorating in that style? Stepping over a pile of laundry, dogs, and toys to crawl into bed with a good book?
Recently I left my home, and I don’t have another one in sight. I knew this would be traumatic. I’ve never relished big changes, and moving is huge. I tend to grow deep roots and, like the grass in my former flowerbeds, resist being pulled away.
This experience has made me think about what home means to me. It means rest; a place to regroup with my family. It is where I cuddle on the couch with hubby to watch TV or read to the kids. Where we say our prayers together and cuddle on lazy Saturday mornings. Home is also a place where I nurture relationships with the people in my life. My husband, my children, my children’s friends, my friends, neighbors, extended family… The list goes on.
What does one do without a home? Yes, our family has a wonderful place to stay, but I still feel lost. I ache for the company of those I left behind and I miss having a place to invite them to.
My mind keeps going to the many stories I’ve read in the Bible. God’s people often had to leave their homes and forge new ones. Back before Interstates and cars, people had to depend on the hospitality of others. Jesus sent out a group of disciples and told them to only take the clothes on their backs. We took a bit more, but maybe instead of feeling sorry for myself I should think about how those servants of Jesus felt. They didn’t even have a minivan filled with Fritos and sunscreen smears to retreat into. Nor did they have a phone that gives directions to the nearest Starbucks… They took a step in faith and watched the Lord to work through them.
So… I will take a breath and use this time to grow. I will hug my children and use this freedom from my yard to recharge for the next phase in my life. I will trust that the Lord has a plan in mind and wait for Him to take me there. (Stay tuned. Waiting will probably be my next character lesson…) In addition to the other things I am learning, I will have a new appreciation for the wandering Israelites and the believers who followed Jesus’ commands to simply go.
May the Lord bless you all on whatever journey He has given you to take.
Hello, Jennifer:
As I read your blog entry today, I want to give you a big hug because I can relate to every “human” feeling you’re experiencing. Almost 5-months ago, my family of 4 moved to The Woodlands, TX from the great weather, beautiful beaches of Orange County, CA. A year ago, my husband suggested of moving to Houston, and honestly my selfish heart was not open at all! My decision to move changed unexpectedly when my father died of liver cancer in the Philippines on 02/21, and I had the opportunity to be with him for 10-days in the hospital.
When I received the call after I returned to the US, my heart felt broken into pieces, and all I could think in that moment was my/our boys did not get to know my father, their grandfather. Within few seconds, I said to my husband: “Let’s go and do it!” My husband’s mother (71-years-old) and great grand-mother (92-years-old) are from Houston, and, the fact, that they are still alive is a gift of life to be treasured by my young boys, and I want them to capture every moment they have with their grandmothers!
On top of this emotional pain of losing my father, which to this day, I still have not allowed myself to fully grieve. On 02/23, my husband announced that his job will be ending 09/30 and he’s been given the chance to work from home if he so desired. After sleepless nights of borrowing tomorrow’s trouble, my husband and I humbly sought God’s guidance in prayer, and He revealed to us slowly but surely the total peace we needed to move forward with our decision.
So, on 04/11 we packed our stuff in this huge U-haul truck and survived 1550 miles of travel journey from CA to TX. In this present “waiting” season of life, God has manifested His blessings to me and my family in so many ways. Our new-normal life in The Woodlands, a very beautiful family community, has provided practical (better schools)/financial benefits (cheaper rent) to our family, and we’re beginning to meet new friends, found a great church, and we get to see both grandmothers whenever we want.
However, I must confess that for 2-months there I complained/worried/nagged. Then, one day, I got tired of being/feeling tired…constantly ruminating the life I had in Orange County: the breezy weather, the beautiful beaches, friends, and our home-mega church.
In terms of my husband’s current job, his manager called the first part of August and extended his employment thru end of December, and still actively job searching in the Houston market while working from home and fulfilling family obligations. It has not been easy for both of us as well as our boys, especially in this extreme summer heat!
This moving journey has been a humbling process for me in terms of letting go of everything and allowing God be in control. Two verses I cling to as we wait for the next chapter of our lives:
“The LORD will guide you always; He will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land and will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well-watered garden, like a spring whose waters never fail.” ~ Isaiah 58:11
Isaiah 17: 7 “But blessed is the one who trusts in the LORD, whose confidence is in him. 8 They will be like a tree planted by the water that sends out its roots by the stream. It does not fear when heat comes; its leaves are always green. It has no worries in a year of drought and never fails to bear fruit.”
Jennifer, you have been a source of encouragement to me.
Sorry for the rambling, Chris/The Woodlands, TX
Chris,
I can so relate to you! When I first finished college I, also, was taken to Houston by the Lord. I lived just south of where you are now. 🙂 The people there are wonderful! But the weather…? Let's just say I couldn't believe I had to use my car's a/c in January as I drove south on I-45! (I had to smile about the "sun-scorched land." Houston is HOT! However, with the humidity, plants and gardens seem to grow well. Some of my friends had beautiful yards.)
Thank you for sharing the details of your journey. You are an encouragement to me and to anyone else who reads your comments.
I'm so happy to hear you have begun to embrace your new life there. Every time I visit the Woodlands, I love it, but I understand your yearning for home. I hope in this move that you will find what I did in my last move to an idyllic community that was much like the Woodlands. I found a community full of wonderful people and friends that I didn't want to leave when the time came to move. I also found a new dependence on the Lord and a deepening of my relationship with Him.
Thanks for sharing your heart, my sweet friend/sister! God bless you in your new journey. I look forward to hearing more from you and the wisdom that is so evident in your heart.
Hugs!