There’s that overly used saying, “It takes a village.”
As I navigate raising three 17 -year-olds and a 20 year-old in college, the village is more like a small camp. I’m not talking cult-like camps. I’m talking a small gathering of tents with occupants who sit by the fire and listen and pray.
This is not literal.
I don’t like to camp. (Campfire smell in my hair. Ew.)
This is just the terminology with which I came up.
Teenagers don’t like anyone in their business. Especially mom and dad. If you’re fortunate, they will invite you into their business because they know you will pray for them.
They also hope you will give them direction. And they often want you to tell them everything will go just the way they want it and you will also tell them to do what they want to do even if they know it is not what they should do.
Did you follow that trail through the woods?
I have teenage girls. Three of the four of them are rather forthcoming with what is happening in their world. Another is Miss Shrug Her Shoulders. I often get an “eh”when I ask “how are things?”
I have to read her body language and her tone to get an idea what is happening in her life. I don’t find the details necessarily, but I can tell when there is a smoke signal lit for SOS.
My go-to method has and always will be prayer. Constant, intentional prayer without ceasing.
Sometimes, I have to call in the troops…er…the campers.
Without going into massive details, I have folks I text and ask to pray.
I don’t divulge my teen’s deepest fears or every minuscule fact. Depending on the kid, I know what other specific adults in her life care deeply enough about her to pray for her. The girls do not know who these folks have been.
Some have shifted over the years as their roles in the girls’ lives have shifted. There are people God has placed in my daughters’ lives who I see breathing life into them.
Sunday school teachers. Coaches. Aunts. Grandparents. Mom friends. Youth leaders.
They are the people who tend to get the “will you support me?” mail for fundraisers and missions opportunities. They may get asked to write reference letters or to make recommendations in our daughters’ favor.
They are invested. I have been that person for a number of young people over the years. Many of them have grown up and gotten married and now have children of their own. And a couple of those “kids” have mentored my kids.
As parents, we need some fellow campers who “hike” the trails of rough terrain and help us carry the load.
We read about this in Galatians 6. “Carry one another’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.”
How do we fulfill Christ’s law when we pick up the load of others?
It’s love.
Galatians 5:14, “For the whole law is fulfilled in one word: “You shall love your neighbor as yourself.”
I have no doubt the people I have requested to be in my camp love my family. They are willing to cheer for us, cry with us, and even gently rebuke us when necessary. That’s love. And we do the same for the campers.
Not that long ago, I was especially thankful for my camp friends as they assisted in the heaving and lugging as we transported a concern uphill for one of my daughters.
She was overwhelmed with a decision to try something new in an unfamiliar setting. The incident had her feeling like a little girl away at camp. My daughter was leaning toward fear and unknowns. She was not really keen on my encouragement or my husband’s suggestions. So we both prayed.
And I called on a very small number of campers. By the end of the day, I knew each one of them lifted her to the throne. I also knew I would need to be patient.
And when I least expected it, she had made a decision.
My daughter had no idea our secret campers were praying. And the greatest part was that God had sent a crew of her peers to encourage her as we prayed. Those young people helped her to see her capabilities.
It’s nice to see a new generation of campers rising up.
I thank God for those who “camp out” with us.
If you don’t have camper people, ask God to find them for you. He will answer. It’s never a bad idea to ask those you trust to help you carry the load.
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