Pregnancy and childbirth are truly miraculous, wonderful events. There’s the anxious anticipation of what your child will look like, who they will become, and what kind of personality they will bring.
You spend months coming up with a name, a theme for the nursery, and picking out the perfect registry items.
You’re elated to feel their first movements and hear the heartbeat at each doctor’s appointment. Then the day finally arrives when you will come face-to-face with your newborn and begin the journey into motherhood.
The Truth About Postpartum No One Talks About
Maybe for you the delivery experience was all you’d hoped it would be. Maybe, like me, it was the start of many challenges faced as a new mom.
I remember the joy I felt on the first day in the hospital. I had to deliver by c-section, but everything had gone smoothly. Our little girl was healthy and beautiful. The care she and I received that day was wonderful.
Unfortunately, I couldn’t say the same for the days after. I have already been diagnosed with clinical anxiety, but when I began being monitored for high blood pressure after delivery, it only enhanced my anxious thoughts about my health.
We also started experiencing feeding issues and a drop in my daughter’s weight that really caused me to spiral. Through the grace of God, we were finally able to come home as a family.
We continued to struggle with feeding difficulties, and I battled spiraling feelings for not doing enough for her nutritionally.
Thankfully, I have a church community of other young moms who faced similar challenges. I reached out for advice and was pleasantly surprised at the stories I heard and encouragement they brought to me and my situation.
You see, no one ever really prepares you for the challenges once the baby arrives.
On one hand, I don’t guess anyone ever really can adequately prepare you until you are thrust into the cycle yourself. Everyone’s experience is different, everyone’s child is different, the situations are not the same.
You have working moms, moms staying at home, spouses who travel, moms who are raising little ones on their own; the scenarios are endless.
My hope is to shed light and hope for moms who are facing the challenges that postpartum brings and may be wondering to themselves, “it’s not supposed to be this way”.
Feeling Overwhelmed? Here are 13 Words of Encouragement for Moms of Littles
3 Tips for Postpartum Challenges
It’s been almost two years since giving birth to my daughter and I’m still learning. But I have found a few things along the way that can help ease the stress and struggle of the postpartum season.
1. Find a community and get involved!
I cannot stress this one enough, but the journey of motherhood can be lonely, and it only makes the days feel longer and challenging if you don’t invite others into the journey with you.
This doesn’t have to be complicated or grand. Something as simple as spending time at another mom’s house while the kids play can be rewarding. Find a Mommy and Me group to get involved with, a Mother’s Day Out program that fits your needs for some alone time. I am lucky to be surrounded by a community of young families at the church I attend that I can lean on for support and advice.
2. If you’re a stay-at-home mom, get out of the house regularly.
This one can be more difficult, especially if you have more than one child in tow, but it’s so helpful to your mindset and even for the children too. A change of scenery does the body and mind good.
Again, this doesn’t need to be a full day excursion, keep it short and simple, especially in the beginning. Grab a coffee at the local shop, run to the grocery store, and even just go through a drive-thru, but getting out will be good for mom’s mental health and it’s good for the children to experience something new.
As you get more comfortable with outings, check out your local library for story time sessions. This is a good time for children to learn to play together with others and for moms, it’s a way to meet other moms in the community and maybe have some adult conversations.
3. Dedicate time with God and to prayer every day.
Before my daughter came into the picture, I had a regular routine of writing in a prayer journal every morning before heading off to work. It set the tone of my day and quieted my mind. These days my quiet time looks very different.
It has changed from first thing in the morning to middle of the night, evenings after bedtime, or midday during naps. Some days I missed them all together. I can tell the difference on the days that I do miss. You must find what works for you. Everyone’s day is going to look different. Be consistent with talking to God and reading from his Word. It makes a world of difference.
Here are some of my favorite verses for being encouraged:
“So humble yourselves before God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Come close to God, and God will come close to you. Wash your hands, you sinners; purify your hearts, for your loyalty is divided between God and the world.” – James 4:7-8 NLT
“Remain in me, and I will remain in you. For a branch cannot produce fruit if it is severed from the vine, and you cannot be fruitful unless you remain in me.” – John 15:4 NLT
If you’re facing postpartum challenges today, remember: It may not be the way you thought it would be, but God is still faithfully meeting you right here in it.