One of the greatest things the Lord has done for us is giving us older, wiser women to model godliness for us. We see these women all around us–at church and in our communities, our moms and mothers-in-law. They are everywhere.

The Lord has done great things for us, and we are filled with joy.

Psalm 126:3

Unfortunately for many of the younger women in need of wisdom, they are not finding godly wisdom coming from the mouths of many of the older women surrounding them.

I have had the privilege of teaching, discipling, and working with many young women and I have found that many of these young women are running away from the “wisdom” offered up by the older women in their lives. Much of this wisdom is good but too much of it is not godly wisdom.

Often our own daughters call just to talk (because they want to hear our perspectives on certain situations) and we don’t take the time to pray. We begin spouting off what we feel or believe is best for them. As older Christian women, we must return to being women of God’s word and women of prayer.

I believe it is our desire that the “words of my mouth and the meditations of my heart are acceptable in the sight of God,” but we sometimes forget to ask God to put a “guard over our tongues, and set watch over the door of our lips” (Psalms 141:3). We often talk to young women like this world is their home instead of pointing them to their Heavenly Father who has gone to prepare a place for them.

This may seem like a rant, but I recently learned of a misguided conversation that is one of many that is revealing to me that we have strayed.  A friend’s recent call to her mother-in-law to tell her she was pregnant resulted in an alarming conversation. The mother-in-law began to tell her she must have a boy because her son needs a son to do things with … they already have a daughter. I believe it is right for this mother to express her desires, but she should first be excited about God’s amazing gift of a new grandchild, no matter the sex. This would have turned the entire outcome of the conversation around and this young daughter-in-law would not be walking around wounded. We need to look at things in light of God’s gracious gifts to us and not our selfish wants or desires.

Older women, when we are called on by the younger women in our lives, we need to be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger (James 1:19). The only way to do this is to be so in tune with God that He is all that matters. We must understand that when younger women call on us, they are usually calling at a most vulnerable time with something that deeply affects them.

These are the times when we may need to say a mouthful by saying nothing at all, and take time to pray before we speak.

Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.

James 5:16