You might be shocked to learn that there are an alarming number of spouses who use sex as a weapon in their marriage. When frustrations and aggravations occur in everyday life, withholding sex is for many the key to getting a bit of revenge and seeking retaliation. God never intended the most intimate of His creations to be used as a weapon. Doing so creates wounds and a voluminous chasm between husband and wife.

Are you currently staring over a wide chasm and wondering why and how you got there … and who can help you build a bridge?

Sex was designed by God to create oneness in marriage and that is His desire for you in your marriage. Interestingly, there are vast differences between the sexes when it comes to sex. In the article  How Do Men and Women Differ in How They View Sex? (Editor’s Note: There’s a great chart noting the specific differences between men and women’s views of sex here …), Dennis and Barbara Rainey have some amazing words of wisdom for you in answer to that question.

“For sex to be truly satisfying to both partners, each has to risk being totally open and vulnerable to the other. Each person in the marriage should feel needed, wanted, accepted and loved sacrificially. And one of the keys to building this type of relationship is understanding the general differences between men and women in how they view sex. These differences cause certain expectations on the part of men and women that often lead to misunderstanding, frustration, and disappointment.”

When feeling frustrated if your weapon of choice is withholding sex, I strongly encourage you to seek wise counsel from a godly friend, go see a Christian counselor, and seek forgiveness and reconciliation with your spouse.

Love can build a bridge.

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