Disciplining Boys: An “Aha!” Moment
I can tell when it’s happening. My son wants to hit everything (or everyone) in sight with something: his foam sword, his body, a pillow, a blanket, a piece of cardboard. He starts doing his “exercises,” as he calls them—a circuit up the stairs, down the stairs, throws himself on the couch. Up the stairs, down the stairs, throws himself on the couch.
The diagnosis: testosterone overload.
He loves books, computers, and hanging out indoors. But when he gets to this point, one of us is going to have to go outside! So one day at the park after I saw him throwing rocks, I commanded him to run around the park three times (it was a small park). And when he was done … he kept going!
My friend at the park commented that she’s heard of people making their kids do push-ups, or even wall sits in a military family she knew. That’s when I remembered that on days my boys have really been acting up, my husband questions, “Have they been outside?” I came from a family of all girls, so I am near clueless about these things.
So this last week, I’ve switched my consequence for over-the-top-rambunctiousness and other behavior that I would judge as testosterone-driven. Time out, which in the past has seemed to just compound the problem, is now running around the yard a proportionate amount of times. And I think it’s working!
I’m already planning for winter by having my husband teach my 5-year-old how to do push-ups. Or maybe I’ll just keep a sweatshirt by the door …
LOVE this! YES we have done that before and I have forgotten to do it. Time to begin the lapse again!
This is a great idea! My son is 10 years old now, but I remember when he was of preschool and early elementary school age, I would take him to the levee. We would run up then roll down the levee! Fun, fun, fun! He was worn out in no time(me too!)!!:) Now I just send him outside with a football or tell him to take a bike ride. Sometimes I go with him…that way it doesn’t feel like a punishment/banishment for him and is great excerise for me and bonding time for us.
Thank you! I have an 18 month old boy and a five year old girl. My husband and I have been trying to figure out a strategy to discipline our beautiful, brilliant, but at times aggravating son who has started to hit his adoring older sister, the dog, and everything in site.
I will be trying this method today. I’m sure his sister will enjoy running with him!
Tiffany makes a great point, in that I can’t let exercise become solely associated with punishment. I’m trying to make sure we do other stuff that is exercise (other than running circles around the yard, that is) that he’ll enjoy.
I’m amazed at how adding the physical aspect to something makes it so much more fun for him. Yesterday I put flashcards of his reading words at two spots in the yard, then had him run back and forth reading one word from each pile, while I timed him on how long it took for him to read them all. Of course, that combines the physical and competition, which is a win-win for my son!