I had the most remarkable time with my oldest son last weekend—it was our very first date night.
My eldest son and I can butt heads from time to time, and I could never figure out what the problem was until I read Gary Chapman’s The Five love Languages for Kids. And then like a ton of bricks it hit me that my son’s love language is quality time. With two younger brothers it can be hard for him to see the attention given to the little guys who need more guidance and are given a bit more grace, too. So his natural tendency was to act out to the attention.
About a week ago I took him to a birthday party—just the two of us—and I decided that would be a great opportunity to ask him if he wanted to go on a date with Mom. The look in his eyes and face were priceless. He just lit up, and for the rest of the week his demeanor changed and we got along far better than we had in a couple of weeks.
I told him we could not leave the house since Dad was out of town, but we would put his little brothers to bed and then we could do whatever he wanted to do. I imagined game after game after game, but all he wanted to do was word searches. So, that’s what we did—we did word searches and drank chocolate milk for about two hours. It was amazing! It was not only what he needed, but it was just what I needed too.
It’s important that we as moms and parents are paying attention to our kids and their needs. Not just needs in the sense of baths, brushed teeth, clean clothes, etc. But we need to be aware of their emotional needs as well.
Pour into them and enjoy them. Dads, date your girls. Moms, date your sons because soon enough they will be dating, and it will not be you they want to date.
I feel like I have my son back and he has his mom back. All our kids are different and we need wisdom to see how we can best be loving on each one individually. Who better to ask than God?